May 10, 1991
Well, today was kind of a slow day again. We were only able to teach one of our regular investigators. We taught a discussion to See Vang. He let us listen to the first song on an album that he is in the process of recording. It was really good. Anyway, we taught him a 4th discussion. It seemed to go pretty well, but not exceptionally well. We still need to go back and teach him the 3rd discussion.
We also spent sometime today allowing my comp to se some Hmong people and practice teaching them. He seems to be doing some better. Tomorrow we need to talk a little about the difference between knowing the language and simply using the gift of tongues. I hope that I can help him to learn what he needs to learn.
Today was kind of a hard day for me motivationally. I am starting to realize that it is going to be a long hard haul here in Stockton. i wish I could find the same motivation I had last month in Fresno. I imagine that it is not a matter of wishing, it is just a matter of doing. I’ll just have to do better tomorrow. Everyone gets to have a tough day every now and then. Today was mine.
May 11, 1991
Today went pretty well, but I am still having a hard time knowing exactly what to do here. It is still hard to know exactly how the Lord wants me to go about things here. For some reason, I feel really lost still. I suppose I feel a lot like I did when I first got to Visalia. I wish I could really get a hold on things and get stuff going. I am sure that we will be able to do it soon.
We found some inactive families today that we invited back to church. They are bother part-member families. That makes it so hard on both the members and the non-members. It is so much better if the whole family is baptized. Unfortunately the members seem as though they are acting as the stumbling block to the nonmembers. It is really sad. i hope that we can get back to them and try to help them out a little. It is also hard because the nonmembers in those families have already said no once.
I got rocked at the mailbox again today. Oh well, since tomorrow is Mother’s Day, I will get to talk to my family. I wonder if Kristin will call tomorrow. I wonder what she is doing right now. I still feel like I hardly even know what she is up to. I wish I knew. I really miss her friendship.
May 13, 1991
Wow! Did I need a P-day today or what? It was really nice. We washed the entire apartment. What a pain. President and Sister Bott are inspecting all of the apartments this week,so we had to clean it really well.
After that, we went shopping for food and that kind of stuff. I also bought a birthday present for Kristen and sent it to her.
Yesterday was Mother’s Day, so I got to call home. It was sure good to talk to everyone at home.
We met with a lot of people tonight, but we weren’t able to teach any discussions. It was just that no one seemed to be free. Oh well, tomorrow we can get on it and get it going. Tomorrow is the day that I am really going to start to get after it hard.
May 14, 1991
Today really went well, We were able to teach 3 discussions as well as add 2 families to our teaching pool. However, I found some things out today that really upset me. Jeff Bohn had been going around to the people that he helped baptize and teach and getting them all involved in some multi-level marketing scheme. I can’t imagine going around and trying to make money off of the people that I have taught the gospel too! I don’t know what he is thinking! Besides that, the stuff that he is selling is a flat out rip off! We talked to President Bott about it tonight and he said to call the stake president tomorrow morning and let him take care of it. Hopefully, he will just call Elder Bohn and take care of it that way. I hope he will do it.
District Meeting this morning was kind of fun. I am the second oldest missionary in our district! I can not believe that I have been a missionary for nearly one year! That just blows my mind! Anyway, we talked a lot about ways to get throngs going in our areas and we set some pretty high goals for our district. I hope that we can reach those goals!
May 15, 1991
we spent until about 2:00 p.m. today at the hospital with Ming Lee. He is one of our members. he had to have an appendectomy. Anyway, we spent quite a while with him this morning and went back to see him again tonight. He seems to be doing pretty well. We will of back to see him again tomorrow afternoon.
Right now we have about 5 families that are to the point that they need to make a decision about whether or not they want to be baptized. I am really praying for them. I hope that they will be able to get the answers that they are praying for. I hope that they will be able to understand the answer that the Spirit gives to them.
We taught 3 discussions today, including one to Nopparat. She was really spaced out today. I hope that she is understanding all of this stuff. Sometimes she is really interested, and sometimes she seems like she couldn’t careless. I think that maybe that has something to do with the fact that she doesn’t have the Holy Ghost yet. I guess that we need to do a better job of insuring that she feels the Spirit daily. Some days she is really tired from work. I’ve learned on thing when you are tired, it is almost impossible to feel the Spirit.
May 16, 1991
I am really tired tonight. I’m not too sure why I am so tired, but I am. It really stinks! I with that I could always be full of energy. Today we met with and dropped a lot of our investigators. They are the people that have seen a lot of missionaries before, and we taught them some too. The problem is that they simply won’t commit to do anything. As a result, we are going to go find some people who are really searching for the truth.
I got a letter from jane the other day. Her life is still a mess. I wish there was something that I could do to help her.
Lately, I have really missed some of the things that I enjoyed about college. For instance, I miss just goofing off. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be able to take another year of this. I also don’t want to ever quit being a missionary. I love being a missionary, it’s just that sometimes I get tired. I want to be so tired at the end of my mission that i can’t even get out of bed for weeks. Growth is tiring, maybe that’s why I’m so darn tired. if I’m growing half as much as I’m tiring, then it is well worth it.
I don’t like days when we have to drop investigators. It always makes me feel very alone.
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